Hello lovely,
Some days I don’t feel like a poet. Sure, I may write poetry and have published a few books, but am I really a poet?
It’s okay to have days where you don’t feel like you are your creative passion - be that a poet, writer, artist, musician, photographer… Not every day is meant to be spent serving and nourishing our craft.
Some days, I feel mediocre at best. That is in comparison to the poets I truly admire, and on occasion, aspire to be like. But god forbid I compare myself to others - it’s a deadly tightrope walk to be on. Or so we’re told. If we don’t compare ourselves from time to time, how are we supposed to improve or be inspired? How are we supposed to take the things we love and transform them into our own if we don’t look outwards occasionally?
I’ll be honest, I’m a little tired of hearing the constant messages to ‘stay in your own lane’ and ‘focus on your own journey’. Whilst I believe they are great concepts to be aware of, it is our human nature to compare ourselves to those who inspire us. If you don’t look over at the other lane every now and then, how are you meant to stay motivated and not become complacent?
In one of my previous posts that I wrote last year, I spoke of how comparison is a bitch. And yes, I still very much believe that. Because what I feel people are trying to get across when they say ‘stay in your own lane’ and ‘focus on your journey’, is to not let comparison take over your life. Don’t let it make you bitter or jealous, or end up down a rabbit hole of depression.
Why has it become such a normal thing to question our work and what we put out there into the world?
Maybe it’s because we tend to tie so much of our worth to our work. Which arguably, we should do! We’ve spent our time, energy and creative resources doing so. But in reality, there is just so much out there in the world now, that it’s become all too easy to fall into the trap of allowing our worth to become tethered to our creativity.
A lot of that post still rings true for me, as I do have days where I don’t feel like a poet, or a writer, or an author. But I am all of those things. And I do still have days where I let the comparison demon win. Only now I’m trying to use it as a way to motivate me to improve my craft.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, that’s okay if you don’t always feel worthy of calling yourself a writer, or an artist, or whatever you may be, but that is all the more reason to do so. Imposter syndrome is real and you can’t let it win, otherwise you will lose yourself in the black hole that is comparison and creative burn out.
We’re all experts at being overly judgemental of our own work, and thus have days where we don’t feel worthy of calling ourselves what we truly are. On the days you are struggling, use it as a reminder to look back on your journey and how far you’ve come - it will humble you and give you the strength you need to carry on.
This was written as part of the Essay Club over at Sparkle on Substack by the lovely . Whilst I may not write 24 essays by January 2025, I love the idea of keeping myself accountable to write more and focus more of my energy here than other social channels. Some days I really struggle with what to share on here because I want it to be different to my other platforms, and I want to grow more as a writer, and not just as a poet. So, I’m looking forward to the challenge.
I so resonate with your post Jenna and recently I’ve been practicing more gratitude to reduce the amount of comparisons I make. I am finding it helpful to look for what I can be thankful for in someone else’s ✍️ ❤️
I think we are all poems, each of us. Maybe we all need to write about a poem who doesn’t feel like a poem. What would your poem sound like?